Help Wanted
by TombCrank the Crafty
Summary: Nobody inspires the fear of god into KaibaCorp employees quite like the CEO himself. A look into how one man tries to keep KaibaCorp fully staffed.


Being the head of Human Resources at Kaiba Corp was no easy job. In fact, it was anything but. While Gozaburo Kaiba had been a cruel tyrant, even at his worst he hadn't gone through researchers and secretaries like his chosen successor did. Seto Kaiba's unyieldingly high standards (shorter than Everest, taller than K2) made him less tolerant of other's mistakes, although he too held himself up to such demanding measures, an admirable trait.

The common life-span of a Kaiba Corp secretary for any office above the twelfth floor was a week and a half. Surreptitious bets were placed on the survival of any given secretary and right now the pot stood at an all time high. (He himself abstained from the gambling – over the past ten years he had won nearly five million yen and it was unfair to keep fleecing the poor techies from the 34th floor.) Ms. Frances, Seto Kaiba's latest in a long line of secretaries, was currently the second-longest surviving assistant at four months, five days and counting. Her continued employment made his job easier. For one thing, it gave him more time to line up potentials and more time meant better quality. Besides, he was busy trying to refill the 23rd floor. Slightly... contaminated liquid had dripped from Research and Development area down into a lawyer's office. Nothing dangerous, but it was the R&D department, so the entire floor was put on sick leave. Indefinitely. He was quite sure it was no accident (Kaiba's hatred of lawyers was almost as legendary as his inability to keep a secretary) but that's not what he was paid for. A memo sent to his office made it clear he was to prioritize on engineers. For the moment.

Kaiba was a capricious boss. His first week in control of Kaiba Corp was spent consolidating his power base and one of the first to go had been the previous head of H.R. As the only (barely) qualified employee in the department, he had been unpredictably promoted, despite a junior status in the company. With a chill, he had realized such a job was more curse than blessing. His job description was to replace all the researchers, scientists, janitors, computer technicians, secretaries, etc. Seto Kaiba personally fired within hours. Keeping that in mind, he had quite a few binders filled with up-to-date information on potential employees for every position imaginable. Need a tech repair man, good with Duel Disks? Here's a list of twenty. (Kaiba Corp went through Duel Monster machinery experts like pocky. It had paid off on several occasions to keep a waiting list that high.) How about a typist, skilled at taking dictations in both Japanese and English? Or a researcher in particle physics, chemistry, or calculus? He had the names. Which was why he was still gainfully employed. A job for Kaiba Corp, if you did your job well, is quite lucrative. (Kaiba, aware of his own eccentricities, paid even better than Industrial Illusions, and Pegasus was a certified nut-job.) A few more pay checks and he would have the college tuition at University of Tokyo Business School fully paid for his children, aged two and six.

Today, however, was a Friday, so he couldn't be sure of anything. After young Mokuba Kaiba demanded the CEO give up weekends in the office (along with his laptop, which was surrendered with protest), Seto Kaiba would check up on pet projects and the like, to see how things were progressing and when the did not measure up, a usual occurrence, the pink slips appeared. The mail boys, nicknamed angels of death by most of the company employees in Domino, demanded over-time and hazard pay on Fridays, on account of the sheer numbers the had to deliver and the occasional hissy-fits that ensued. Old Shishido in accounting (coincidentally the longest employed person in the company) agreed completely.

"Sir? Mr. Kaiba just hit the 11th floor two minutes ago. I count three pink slips and one hysterical notary."

"Damn," He swore. "I almost had the evening off."

"Sorry to be the bear of bad news, sir."

"Thank you anyways," he nodded a dismissal to his subordinate. "Hmm, the eleventh floor is... oh, yes, Duel Monster consultants," he muttered to himself.

He knew that if he were to quit (as opposed to being fired), his position elsewhere would be less harrowing and much more secure. However, he'd be bored to tears and quite useless in a slower paced environment. Besides, his seniority at Kaiba Corp was second only to Shishido as the longest-lasting employee. Why would he give up that sort of notoriety, just to sit behind a desk?

No, he was happy here. Even if he did want to bang his head on his desk every so often.

FIN.

* * *

Judging almost solely on Seto Kaiba's basic personality, I can only imagine how taxing it must be to work for a man as demanding as Kaiba. With such a large company under his control, it is only inevitable that he fire employees and they obviously would need to be replaced. The point of view is from an original character (obviously) and though he doesn't have a name, I liked what he had to say from an unassuming view.

TombCrank the Crafty


End file.
